I Still Say I Should Have Been The Next Charlotte Green

MURIEL MAKES AN ACTUAL COMMENT ABOUT SOMETHING (and only says 'fuck' once)

My Bottom. I've learnt to love it.

YES, OKAY - THAT IS MY DERRIÈRE at the top of the page. I'm a little surprised at it myself, considering my age - but goodness me, how long does a woman have to wait before she gains a bit of body-confidence?

VANILLA ICE? DEAR, HOW AMUSING

That said, this article interested me: I love Annie Lennox and I think she makes a very good point here. I'm not getting messages of body-confidence from Miley Cyrus or Rihanna (78 million Facebook 'likes'. That's a lot of teenagers to influence); rather, a very confusing and dangerous one. As I'm not writing for the Daily Fucking Mail, I'm not going to start speculating on what goes on inside the head of a 20-year-old, born to a famous dad, who has herself been famous for half her life. But I do think back to when Madonna was at the height of her 'Erotica' phase, when she first invented Sex (thanks Madge, don't know what we'd have done without you) and performed in titillating videos which were banned from our TV screens. Banned! Ha! Ha! The difference between Miley and Madonna? Madonna was thirty-four.*

NOT GETTING IT

One of the things I love about Burlesque is that it is often performed by slightly older women, for slightly older women. It's the same with my poetry - if they're too young, they may not get it. Of course, I'm very happy when they

Annie Lennox: a real role model

do, and I have met a great many bright, educated, gorgeous younger girls/women at various gigs. But crikey, when one starts going through the fancying-Melvyn-Bragg stage, there are aspects of one's work, inevitably, that take one to a place where the teens-and-twenties may not wish to follow. What am I trying to say? Maybe that you don't have to be 18 and perfect to wiggle your rear-end in public, and if you are, maybe you want to just give it a few years. Or at the very least, just be absolutely sure who it is you're trying to please.

LARGE BOTTOM

I spend a lot of time surrounded by scintillating, confident, sexy women of all ages, shapes and sizes. I am filled with love and admiration for them. I don't recall ever - ever - seeing any thrusting or groping of fannies on a Burlesque stage. Burlesque seems to me to be more delicate than that. You want strong, positive, independent female role models? I'll introduce you to a hundred.

Or you could try Annie Lennox. She's really good.

*STOP PRESS: I've just read that Cher's weighed in to the debate.  Now, when Cher says things have gone a little far, you know, isn't it time to start listening?  I'm now waiting for Lady Gaga to tweet 'Ooh, that's a bit much'...